Straight Pride Parade
Celebrate Heterosexuality with other proud, straight men and women
Are you a proud heterosexual who is feeling left out by the attentiongiven to gays in the national media and popular culture? The join us at the third annual Straight Pride Parade
, a celebration of heterosexual culture and history, to recognize all the straight men and women who for thousands of years have continued the human species through healthy and natural (hetero) sexual intercourse. The traditional, healthy straight lifestyle is practiced by some 99.997% of humans worldwide, who just like you, are: straight...and proud of it!
Join us this Saturday, October 19th at 11:00AM at the center of the Oval to organize and begin preperations for the parade, which is currently schedualed for next spring quarter. Hope to see you there!
Personaly, I think instead of doing what I assume to be the usual counter-protest with a bunch of gay pride slogans, or worse, just ignoring it, we should help make it a real PRIDE parade. We get a bunch of signs, and join as "Parents, friends and family of heterosexuals". Our signs could read, "My son's a bredder, but not a bottom feeder!" We could help outfit the marchers, so that Straight Pride is not represented by cheap clothes and rednecks.
And of course, we also get people to stand along the parade route with signs quotiong the Bible's prohibitions towards heterosexual acts. These peopel get the fun of condeming the marchers to hell for their immoral acts of having sex during menstration and before marriage. And for the tasteless personal assault sign, we get one with a picture of a sniper rifle that says "Snipers cure heterosexuality". (For those of you who read this who weren't around for last year's GLBT PRIDE, some asshole had a sign making reference to the drag queen who got killed by a samuri sword.) And one which reads "Syphillus cures Breeders".
And I also got to watch the floor mopper at #1
Chinese pick his underwear out of his ass after he made my Chicken Lo Mein.